I think I've given up trying to understand the people in my family.
I mean, I understand Papa, most of the time. I spent enough time with him to be able to read him, to have some grasp on the reasoning behind his actions.
But even after all the time I spent with Arthur, I just don't really understand him a lot of the time. For instance, that Prussia guy.... I don't know how Father deals with him, he really scares me.
He's so loud, and he looks so scary! Like a demon of some sort. I just don't see how Arthur can not be creeped out by him. But then, he has been know to like some... weird, things. I guess...
It's still really creepy.
And then, there's Alfred and Matthieu. I really don't get them, either. I know they are my brothers, and for that reason, I do care about them. I just... don't understand them. I don't understand how Matthieu can be in a relationship with Papa, and not feel like he's doing something wrong.
I'm glad he's happy, it just bothers me. I worry, very much about them...
And Dieu seul le sait what Alfred is thinking most of the time. I had heard he was in a relationship with Mr. Russia, but now he's not? It's so hard to keep up.
Sometimes, I really wonder if Peter and I have any right to be as sane as we are.... if we can even be called that...
I wish I had someone I could really talk too. Romano is nice, but he seems busy a lot of the time, and Peter's to young to understand most things. I would try and talk to Hong Kong, but I don't see him often.
Papa and I used to talk, but since this thing with Matthieu... I just don't know. I guess he's busy?
It seems everyone is. Maybe I'm just to small a nation to be noticed? Arthur notices me sometimes, when I go to visit, but I don't feel very comfortable talking all this over with him.
I guess, though, I should visit him. He seems to be the only one I can trust to be at his own home. Even if that creepy Prussia is there with him. I could bring him more tea, he's probably almost out by now....